Pet Peeve Thursdays (On Friday): Flip-A-Roo
(1 Cent): Big Willy
You know what really chaps my cheeks? When sports announcers say the phrase, "He willed his team to victory." Really? You can do that?
I just think that you can't will your teammates -- a whole team -- into victory. The image that always comes to mind when this phrase is said is that of the "willing player" slamming shut his eyes, scrunching his face like it's his first battle with constipation, and mentally chanting, "We're gonna win ... we're gonna win."
Does this phrase mean that the "willing player" sets a good example by playing flawlessly, and it somehow elevates the game of the other players? If that's the case, then how come just this last year, Shaq sucked it up during the NBA Finals? He was on the court with Dwayne "He Looked At Me, I Was Fouled" Wade as he made play after play. Why didn't Shaq do well, then? If Wade was "willing" his team to victory ... then the team missed the message, because it was all Wade, all the time.
Does this phrase mean that the "willing player" has this mind controlling, mutant power (a la Professor X) that can alter the playing abilities of his teammates? Don't you think Kevin Garnett would've used that about 3 years ago on his Timbercubs? I mean, my goodness ... if Garnett doesn't qualify as someone who can "will" his team to victory, I don't know who does -- he's a former league MVP, is ferocious on the boards, will block your shot into row BB 132, and leaves all his emotions out for all to see. Don't you think a team with this man would be able to receive some of that "will" and win more than 33 games?
Let's take an example from another NBA player. My boy, Kobe Bryant, on January 22, 2006 scored an insane 81 points against the Toronto Raptors in a 122-104 Los Angeles Lakers victory. The fact that nobody remembers is that the Lakers were losing 71-53 in the third quarter. His 81 point total didn't come in garbage time, nor was it merely for show. His team was down 18 points and was on the verge of being blown out -- at home. So, what did Kobe do? He got angry and took out his aggression on the entire team (no, really, there were 3 to 4 guys guarding him at times) and scorched the Raps for 55 second half points. He made them from the outside, the inside, the free throw line ... you name it. Now, does this count as evidence of someone "willing" their team to victory? I say, no. Think about it. Who was doing all the scoring? Kobe. Who couldn't score? The rest of the team. (If you don't believe me, check out the box score: http://sports.espn.go.com/NBA/boxscore?gameId=260122013). Kobe wasn't willing his team to victory ... Kobe was willing Kobe -- Kobe won the game for his team.
Perhaps this is just a matter of semantics ... nonetheless, I don't like when I hear the phrase, "He willed his team to victory." Perhaps after I witness Kobe doing some Jedi mind tricks to make Sasha Vujacic, Kwame Brown, and Luke Walton hit a shot, I'll consider using that statement.
(2 Cent): Hand Sanitizer
It might be just me, but smearing around all my germs with hand "sanitizer" doesn't seem too clean to me. Does this sanitizer dissolve my germs into nothingness? Do germs jump off my hand screaming, "Ahh, clear sanitizer that smells like those rubber and plastic X-ray chips that dentists put in your mouth and make me gag, ahh"? The stuff even feels slimy ... it doesn't make me feel sanitized at all.
"Oh, oh ... HCP ... but it has moisturizers and contains vitamin E!" Yeah, it moisturizes all those germs into your hands. Plus, what do I need vitamin E on my hands for? Last I knew, you had to eat the stuff to have any positives effects.
http://lpi.oregonstate.edu/infocenter/vitamins/vitaminE/
Plus, have you ever shook hands with someone that uses hand sanitizer? Ewww. At least, I think it was hand sanitizer ... oh, gah, I'll be right back (after I wash my hands).
So, as for me and my hands, we'll stick to good ol' fashion soap and water.
(1/2 Cent): What Is Going On In This World?
So, I guess I'll wait until this Monday to divulge all the heart pounding excitement of my softball league ... at least, what I can tell you about it.
Also, make sure you keep those comments and questions a comin' ... thanks to all who have been already.
Until next week, keep your eye on the prize!
(I'm going to try different "signing off" phrases until I find a cool one ...).
HCP
You know what really chaps my cheeks? When sports announcers say the phrase, "He willed his team to victory." Really? You can do that?
I just think that you can't will your teammates -- a whole team -- into victory. The image that always comes to mind when this phrase is said is that of the "willing player" slamming shut his eyes, scrunching his face like it's his first battle with constipation, and mentally chanting, "We're gonna win ... we're gonna win."
Does this phrase mean that the "willing player" sets a good example by playing flawlessly, and it somehow elevates the game of the other players? If that's the case, then how come just this last year, Shaq sucked it up during the NBA Finals? He was on the court with Dwayne "He Looked At Me, I Was Fouled" Wade as he made play after play. Why didn't Shaq do well, then? If Wade was "willing" his team to victory ... then the team missed the message, because it was all Wade, all the time.
Does this phrase mean that the "willing player" has this mind controlling, mutant power (a la Professor X) that can alter the playing abilities of his teammates? Don't you think Kevin Garnett would've used that about 3 years ago on his Timbercubs? I mean, my goodness ... if Garnett doesn't qualify as someone who can "will" his team to victory, I don't know who does -- he's a former league MVP, is ferocious on the boards, will block your shot into row BB 132, and leaves all his emotions out for all to see. Don't you think a team with this man would be able to receive some of that "will" and win more than 33 games?
Let's take an example from another NBA player. My boy, Kobe Bryant, on January 22, 2006 scored an insane 81 points against the Toronto Raptors in a 122-104 Los Angeles Lakers victory. The fact that nobody remembers is that the Lakers were losing 71-53 in the third quarter. His 81 point total didn't come in garbage time, nor was it merely for show. His team was down 18 points and was on the verge of being blown out -- at home. So, what did Kobe do? He got angry and took out his aggression on the entire team (no, really, there were 3 to 4 guys guarding him at times) and scorched the Raps for 55 second half points. He made them from the outside, the inside, the free throw line ... you name it. Now, does this count as evidence of someone "willing" their team to victory? I say, no. Think about it. Who was doing all the scoring? Kobe. Who couldn't score? The rest of the team. (If you don't believe me, check out the box score: http://sports.espn.go.com/NBA/boxscore?gameId=260122013). Kobe wasn't willing his team to victory ... Kobe was willing Kobe -- Kobe won the game for his team.
Perhaps this is just a matter of semantics ... nonetheless, I don't like when I hear the phrase, "He willed his team to victory." Perhaps after I witness Kobe doing some Jedi mind tricks to make Sasha Vujacic, Kwame Brown, and Luke Walton hit a shot, I'll consider using that statement.
(2 Cent): Hand Sanitizer
It might be just me, but smearing around all my germs with hand "sanitizer" doesn't seem too clean to me. Does this sanitizer dissolve my germs into nothingness? Do germs jump off my hand screaming, "Ahh, clear sanitizer that smells like those rubber and plastic X-ray chips that dentists put in your mouth and make me gag, ahh"? The stuff even feels slimy ... it doesn't make me feel sanitized at all.
"Oh, oh ... HCP ... but it has moisturizers and contains vitamin E!" Yeah, it moisturizes all those germs into your hands. Plus, what do I need vitamin E on my hands for? Last I knew, you had to eat the stuff to have any positives effects.
http://lpi.oregonstate.edu/infocenter/vitamins/vitaminE/
Plus, have you ever shook hands with someone that uses hand sanitizer? Ewww. At least, I think it was hand sanitizer ... oh, gah, I'll be right back (after I wash my hands).
So, as for me and my hands, we'll stick to good ol' fashion soap and water.
(1/2 Cent): What Is Going On In This World?
So, I guess I'll wait until this Monday to divulge all the heart pounding excitement of my softball league ... at least, what I can tell you about it.
Also, make sure you keep those comments and questions a comin' ... thanks to all who have been already.
Until next week, keep your eye on the prize!
(I'm going to try different "signing off" phrases until I find a cool one ...).
HCP
posted by HCP @ 11:03 AM
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