Pet Peeve Thursdays: Excuse Me, Sir
(1 Cent): One Man Show
You know what really chaps my cheeks? Walking into a restroom (restaurant, gas station, wherever) when it is only for one person but made to seem like many can occupy. For example, the other day I walked into a Chevron restroom -- located inside their surprisingly clean mini mart. The door had the vertical bar handle and no lock. This, to me, usually signals bigger restroom. Wrong-o-la! I start to walk in and there's this old school, cowboy looking dude (who was noticeably startled) telling me he's sorry and squeezing past me, shooting out the door like a baby bull being branded on the butt. There's only one toilet, one sink, one air operated hand dryer. So, why isn't there a lock on that door? Am I supposed to wait inside with the person until their "done?" There is not room enough for two people ... put a lock on it!
I really feel there should be some sort of inspector inspecting this type of thing. Honestly. This has to violate some type of code or something.
Then, while it's my turn to do my business I'm pleading to any pagan god that will hear me to not let someone barge in to have that awkward, "Hey ... uh ... I'll just ... yeah ... sorry" conversation.
Just to recap: doors with locks for a one person restroom ... doors with no locks for a multi-person restroom. It's simple science, really. Maybe even some common sense thrown in. I can't be the only one who thinks like this ... can I?
(2 Cent): One Mo' Thing
While on the subject of restrooms and their non-sanitary ways, how about we have the pull handles for when you enter the restroom and the push plate for when you are leaving the restroom. I know there are some people who do not wash their hands after doing what they gots to do (see above: old school, cowboy looking dude) ... I do not want to have to pull open the door in order to leave the filth infested facility. Only Satan knows what's on that handle ... and I'd prefer to keep it that way.
Maybe I'm a germ-o-phobe ... but maybe I'm just going by some of the restrooms that do have their doors set up that way. You might ask, "Hey, HCP. Why don't you just use a paper towel to open the door then?" Good call, you. But, in this latest instance, there was only an air powered dryer which negated that move. So, the only other tactic was to go grab some butt paper (toilet paper to you laymans) and use it to open the door. Okay, I'm weird ... not just because I do this but because I'm writing about doing this. I think I'll stop now.
(1/2 Cent): Auto Mechanics
Once upon a time, in a land not too distant yet not too close, there lived an auto mechanic named Kalani. He sounds exotic but looked very much like what most people would call "White Trash." He worked at an auto repair shop that specialized in stupidity. HCP needed to replace his O2 sensor in his really old school Cutlass Supreme (c'mon, this was like 7 years ago). He took said car and a newly purchased sensor to Kalani and asked if he would be kind enough to install the part. Kalani said, "No problem." As HCP and his friend JD waited in Kalani's sweet waiting room, consisting of an array of VHS tapes and a 13" screen to watch them on, K-Dogg came back. HCP thought to himself, "Wow, that was quick. Only about 20 minutes." That's where the happiness ends. Kalani asks HCP -- with a straight face and in total seriousness -- if he knew where the O2 sensor went in his car.
Now, many thoughts went through the mind of the HCP. "Is he kidding?" "I brought the car to you because I don't know where it goes, fool!" "Aren't you a mechanic?" "Do I punch you now or later? In the face or in the throat?" "Twenty minutes and nothing is done? I'm surprised you found out how to pop open the hood!"
HCP's response was, "Uh, no ..." to which the masterfully skilled Kalani replies, "Okay, then I'm going to have to charge you a finder's fee." A finder's fee indeed. How about finding where the toilet is in the bathroom, Special K, because it looks like there could be some urine residue on your pants.
So, two hours and $80 later, the sensor was in (hopefully); HCP has a story; everyone lived miserably ever after.
The reason this story is told is to set you up for another mechanic's faux pas dealt by the HCP. Just recently, he needed to get his alignment done (in his Explorer). The mechanic found another problem (really!?) -- the tie rod was bent on the driver's side. So, of course he had to replace this before he could align the automobile correctly. HCP said okay, just do it.
Two hours later, HCP drove off the lot after paying about $160 in parts and labor (how do these fools sleep at night?). The car still pulled right. A couple of days later, HCP took the car in again and asked if they could look at it; the car still wasn't aligned correctly. Another guy looked underneath the car and said that someone replaced the passenger side tie rod; the driver's side was still bent. Perfect. How could one not notice this? HCP felt like he was taking crazy pills!
Short story long, HCP received the other tie rod and installation for free ... and his two major experiences with auto repair shops have been more bitter than tongue kissing Tara Reid after 12 shots and throwing up.
-------------
Have any pet peeves? Have any questions or comments? Like to click on things? Then run that little cursor over the Comments link below and type away! You may also write to HCP2007@gmail.com ... as long as you are not from an Israeli political/war party or are some rich dude from Africa trying to smuggle in millions of dollars through my bank account while asking for my trust. I don't to politics and I only work with straight up cash money.
HCP
You know what really chaps my cheeks? Walking into a restroom (restaurant, gas station, wherever) when it is only for one person but made to seem like many can occupy. For example, the other day I walked into a Chevron restroom -- located inside their surprisingly clean mini mart. The door had the vertical bar handle and no lock. This, to me, usually signals bigger restroom. Wrong-o-la! I start to walk in and there's this old school, cowboy looking dude (who was noticeably startled) telling me he's sorry and squeezing past me, shooting out the door like a baby bull being branded on the butt. There's only one toilet, one sink, one air operated hand dryer. So, why isn't there a lock on that door? Am I supposed to wait inside with the person until their "done?" There is not room enough for two people ... put a lock on it!
I really feel there should be some sort of inspector inspecting this type of thing. Honestly. This has to violate some type of code or something.
Then, while it's my turn to do my business I'm pleading to any pagan god that will hear me to not let someone barge in to have that awkward, "Hey ... uh ... I'll just ... yeah ... sorry" conversation.
Just to recap: doors with locks for a one person restroom ... doors with no locks for a multi-person restroom. It's simple science, really. Maybe even some common sense thrown in. I can't be the only one who thinks like this ... can I?
(2 Cent): One Mo' Thing
While on the subject of restrooms and their non-sanitary ways, how about we have the pull handles for when you enter the restroom and the push plate for when you are leaving the restroom. I know there are some people who do not wash their hands after doing what they gots to do (see above: old school, cowboy looking dude) ... I do not want to have to pull open the door in order to leave the filth infested facility. Only Satan knows what's on that handle ... and I'd prefer to keep it that way.
Maybe I'm a germ-o-phobe ... but maybe I'm just going by some of the restrooms that do have their doors set up that way. You might ask, "Hey, HCP. Why don't you just use a paper towel to open the door then?" Good call, you. But, in this latest instance, there was only an air powered dryer which negated that move. So, the only other tactic was to go grab some butt paper (toilet paper to you laymans) and use it to open the door. Okay, I'm weird ... not just because I do this but because I'm writing about doing this. I think I'll stop now.
(1/2 Cent): Auto Mechanics
Once upon a time, in a land not too distant yet not too close, there lived an auto mechanic named Kalani. He sounds exotic but looked very much like what most people would call "White Trash." He worked at an auto repair shop that specialized in stupidity. HCP needed to replace his O2 sensor in his really old school Cutlass Supreme (c'mon, this was like 7 years ago). He took said car and a newly purchased sensor to Kalani and asked if he would be kind enough to install the part. Kalani said, "No problem." As HCP and his friend JD waited in Kalani's sweet waiting room, consisting of an array of VHS tapes and a 13" screen to watch them on, K-Dogg came back. HCP thought to himself, "Wow, that was quick. Only about 20 minutes." That's where the happiness ends. Kalani asks HCP -- with a straight face and in total seriousness -- if he knew where the O2 sensor went in his car.
Now, many thoughts went through the mind of the HCP. "Is he kidding?" "I brought the car to you because I don't know where it goes, fool!" "Aren't you a mechanic?" "Do I punch you now or later? In the face or in the throat?" "Twenty minutes and nothing is done? I'm surprised you found out how to pop open the hood!"
HCP's response was, "Uh, no ..." to which the masterfully skilled Kalani replies, "Okay, then I'm going to have to charge you a finder's fee." A finder's fee indeed. How about finding where the toilet is in the bathroom, Special K, because it looks like there could be some urine residue on your pants.
So, two hours and $80 later, the sensor was in (hopefully); HCP has a story; everyone lived miserably ever after.
The reason this story is told is to set you up for another mechanic's faux pas dealt by the HCP. Just recently, he needed to get his alignment done (in his Explorer). The mechanic found another problem (really!?) -- the tie rod was bent on the driver's side. So, of course he had to replace this before he could align the automobile correctly. HCP said okay, just do it.
Two hours later, HCP drove off the lot after paying about $160 in parts and labor (how do these fools sleep at night?). The car still pulled right. A couple of days later, HCP took the car in again and asked if they could look at it; the car still wasn't aligned correctly. Another guy looked underneath the car and said that someone replaced the passenger side tie rod; the driver's side was still bent. Perfect. How could one not notice this? HCP felt like he was taking crazy pills!
Short story long, HCP received the other tie rod and installation for free ... and his two major experiences with auto repair shops have been more bitter than tongue kissing Tara Reid after 12 shots and throwing up.
-------------
Have any pet peeves? Have any questions or comments? Like to click on things? Then run that little cursor over the Comments link below and type away! You may also write to HCP2007@gmail.com ... as long as you are not from an Israeli political/war party or are some rich dude from Africa trying to smuggle in millions of dollars through my bank account while asking for my trust. I don't to politics and I only work with straight up cash money.
HCP
posted by HCP @ 10:03 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home